The Tale of the Maid of Honor and Her Wig Made of Horror

The Tale of the Maid of Honor and Her Wig Made of Horror
June 1st, 2008

Sporting with my new sexy, sassy, inverted bob cut, and my fake tan, I couldn’t wait to see my entire family in Houston, Texas where my baby sister, Diana, is finally getting married on May 23rd at a Garden Ceremony and reception. The two main highlights of this wedding are: #1, I will be her Maid of Honor and emcee for her reception program, and #2, after so many years, I will meet again my dad and brother from the Philippines, and my relatives from all over the world. I know one thing is for sure… They all will check on me if I’m still the same HOTTIE as I was before….

HOTTIE? Sure I was! The minute I stepped out of the Houston airport on May 21st… my hottie-ness became obvious through my perspiring armpit… My sophisticated bob curled up and frizzed, and my make up started to melt…. When I popped out my mirror to do a face check, I saw a scary looking person… I DO NOT KNOW HER! The only thing I remember seeing was her horrible WIG! As I try to calm myself down in this humid and rising 95 degrees weather, my self confidence has dropped down to zero...

I was counting my days since day one, as I thought that as soon as this wedding is over, I am ready to go home to my country! Thanks to my super best cousin, Ningning (Mary Linay), she has helped me a lot to focus on the most important role of my life – The Maid of Honor!! It was not easy to focus on being the Maid of Honor when your fabulous hair has just become the WIG made of horror...

The wedding day has come…. After finishing a bottle of hairspray to make my wig “behave” and after rubbing a whole stick of anti-perspirant, I did a fabulous job on my sister’s and mom’s make up. They both look naturally beautiful and radiant. I was so proud of them. My mom did my sister’s hair and her wedding gown. The bottom line is, my sister indeed is the most beautiful bride I have ever seen.

The wedding went very well, but not as perfect as we have planned though. The strong wind was blowing like a mild hurricane, and it has delayed the start time of the garden ceremony. The music had issues and the wind blew out my sister’s long veil and crown as she was walking down the aisle. But nonetheless, the ceremony was perfect, and emotional. I didn’t have time to be emotional during this ceremony. I was busy taking pictures and making sure that no one will faint at this hot and humid weather. At this point, I really don’t care how horrible I look. The most important for me at this moment was my sister. She is the star of this day.

..My only drama after the ceremony was, I tried to stay away from the paparazzi. I have stressed my whole family as I keep hiding from the camera. One family group photo is all I can give. Obviously, my ugly wig has succeeded to rule my world that day. Every time someone will request a photo with me, I will run away! My inner voice was crying, “Go away! Leave me and ugly wig alone!!”..

After seeing our photos, I thought I looked OK and not as bad as I thought. My only conclusion is that I can never survive living in Houston. Because the truth is, my hair doesn’t fit in there.